andai

andai .....
ada kata yang mampu menguraikan rasa kecewa akan kutuliskan semuanya
tetapi tidak ada satu patah kata yg tersusun untuk menggambarkan semua luka didada
ah , ternyata semua rangkaian kata itu tak bermakna ..


* blue sky *

The promise..

Dear Blue Sky,
Remember the time when you promise me something?
You said that you'll give me a special reward if I wanna go back to school and finish my study? You might probably forgot about that promise.. Now, let me re-fresh your memory. It was a year ago precisely in the ramadhan fasting period.. I could never forget your promise after since. I keep in my mind that I have to earn that 'special reward'.. So, if I am now going back to school and start to continue my study, it is not only a matter of having a title.. degree or whatever it is.. Honestly, what I concern at most is.. the reward. I just want you to know that I want to have that reward so bad.. But I wont take it freely, bcos.. nggak seru, ah! Now, I'm gonna enjoy the journey to get 'that'





Wish me luck, okay? Hey, come one.. be fair and wish me luck.. :)
Hmm, I think it will help me alot if you would remind me everymonth.. where is this journey going to end.. :))

Gonna miss u as well...

With love, Blue Ocean

Your last email and the reply from me :)

Dear Blue Sky,
I wont ruin the happiness surrounding you rite now as you are planning to do a big-big-big thing in your life. No, I wont! What I wrote in my reply is also completely true. I am happy for you, I do mean it.
But, if you think that I dont feel something with this 'crack' in our relationship, I must say that it is wrong. I do. I felt something. I felt that some day we could never meet again, even in the horizon, as we always did. And I know for sure that.. when it is come, I'm gonna feel lonely as I cant talk to you any longer.





I'm glad that eventhough you're gonna enter that zone, you will not leave me alone. So, I'll gonna do the same if you ask me too.. I would be here for you.
B'cos I love you.


Love,
Blue Ocean

** I really Love you **

Dear Blue Ocean

Last night I drowning on our ancient email and all lovely poetry
Im smiling and one of my friend Mia told me that Im very lucky to have someone very understanding like you
Arghh Yes indeed .....
Im very Lucky to have someone like you ..
Tried to remembered for couple years ago when de last time we are argued ... uhmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm cant remembered de numbers at all beside couple week ago .. when ... yah uhmm when , when yeaps when I dont realize ur not a stone. Sorrio Love hehe

Dear , as my confession to you lately i have been changed a lots
I have a gut to step in another zone in life .Its not easy but God help me and most of all is You !
Yeah You my Love
Its Your words opening my eyes and my mind
I wont be that zone without you guide me .
Is Your patience and love leads me there .

Now after you read this I do hope your life will much better because Ur happiness is My happiness too .
And to start a lovely day Let me say something to You from deep down my heart .. " I really Love you and I promise never leave you alone again "

Miss you

"Blue Sky "

Ur Not a Stone ....

Dear Blue Ocean

Im really glad we could talk heart to heart today b4 my meeting
Finally I realised about Your true feelings
Sorry , I was blind all these time n made You missarable ..
I really dont mean that ..
As you know I always forgot that *ur not a stone*

Blue
Thank you for your understanding
Thank you for your patience and still Loving me even I said *Kamu Ndableg yah !!! ,..*

Hey Tonight is Full Moon and its so beautifull ..
Im glad we could laugh again

Yours
Blue Sky

Always you...

My Dear BlueSky,

Always is the only word that I can describe about you as well as my feeling about you. Yet we have decided not to meet bcos we both know the answer why, you will also be stay in the depth of my ocean heart.. Permanently. Nothing can take you out from there. As long as I can stare at your blue skin, as long as u can see reflection of your blue, you will always be in my hear. Always in my mind.

Some times love dont need to be spoken. And I will say no more about how much I care about you, how much I love you cos I'm sure that you've already known. As I am here have no doubt abt what your feeling about me.

Yet we can't never own one to another, we still have our soul be united. You're my soulmate.

Maybe I will say no more to you for the rest of my live. But I will let u know every time I long for you. You'll see the color of my heart for you. You'll find what inside my mind abt you.

As I start the jurney of my day this morning with the thougt abt you, I'm sure it will be ended also with you in my mind as I always take a look at stars before I go to bed.

You will always be in my mind.

Always,


*BlueOcean*

Always ................

Dear Blue Ocean My Love


Tonight
I`m sad ... I cried ,Damn I never know the loneliness in you .
Speechless .All these time i just share all my problems with out thinkin about your needed . Im really sorry ..
l hope its not to late to let you know that I always be here for you
No matter whats gonna happen between us is never ever change my feeling to you
" I love you ,,,,,, always "
a l w a y s

Blue Please dont ever be lonely again
look around you ,you should be happy , dont ever say like tonight again
and if you really love me ( anyway I do know u love me ... ) dont ever say that words again

Blue ocean I know is a Fighter
I love him because of his beautifull mind
because of the beauty of his words
because of thousand reason i couldnt explain
and million reason dont have to be xplain at all
I really love you cos what you are

Now about us ...
do you know de reason we cant being together
cos actualy we already have the answer
please dont ever think to cross the border
even we are not together but i do believe our soul is always be united

Please Blue
dont ask me again why ...
but i do hope u could feel de love i have for you
look at the sky ...
I always watching you every minutes in your life
always ...
always
always

* BlueSky*

meet me in the horizon, midnite :)

my dear blue sky...

So, gimana kabarnya hari ini?

Hey, have you notice that this month we're gonna have an amazing moment that we might not face it again for the rest of our life.. The full moon during this year is gonna be amazing cos moon is in her position closing to the earth.. as well as march. just dont miss this wonderfull picture start from early august, take a look to the east start from 8pm - 10pm and end up at 3am. on full moon this august to september, the march will be seemed as big as full moon.

so, think of me when u see it, okay? cos i'm gonna do the same..

today i was so hectic. got to prepare lot of thing in coal project.. company has obtain a concession area at kaltim in which there r so many coal reserves inside there.. it can be explore until the next 20 years.. so, we're now looking for an investor.

duh, maaf ya.. sampe gak sempet sekedar tat-tit-tut buat sms-in kamu, lover :) believe it or not deh judulnya.. hehehehe

i hope i can get involve deeper with this business.

tonite i just realize that i'm so tired. i just need to see u, wherever it gonna be. so, if we can only meet in the horizon for the time being, then let's meet in the horizon.

i miss u
blue ocean

What do you think...

Dear Blue Sky..

What do you think if we change our diary's name to ... 'Our Horizon' instead of 'BlueSkyandBlueOcean'? So, the website address will be... http://OurHorizon.blogspot.com/ or http://TheHorizon.blogspot.com .. instead of http://blueskyandblueocean.blogspot.com/???

Just for simplicity reason, actually.. :))

What do you say?

But, it doesnt matter if we can't change it anymore, hon..

Yours,
Blue Ocean

Should we meet???

Some times i feel.. uhmm, no, no, no.. I cant continue that word..
Well, what should I say.. hmmm, kay!

First, I think I must apology for being late to respond your sms.. I was on d tide up meeting with pak Adi (hmm, should I mention any name here??? well, okelah.. so many pak Adi's name in this world, isnt it?).. to inventory and update things on the Coal project.

Well, you know.. to start anything is always 'ngerepotin banget', 'kan? .. Begitu juga jalanin project ini. We are setting up a new business in coal mining.. Doing this.. doing that.. evaluate this and that.. A lot of things we must done in this week. So, the meeting was taking place for about 2.5 hours, starting from 4.00pm - 6.30pm.. Fiuuh!!!

What I wanna say to you is I'm so excited rite now, dear... You know I've been drowning with bbrp masalah kemarin-kemarin.. which I wish I could share with you tapi gak sempet2 krn kelamaan mikir! :)) .. I know God is never sleep to watch me. He just gave me back to smile again :) ..

Now I'm thinking about you.. Well, I do always think about you, actually.. But, everytime I stand up from the misery, all sudden I remember you. Thanks for giving me a spirit, dear.. Thanks for cheering up my soul. You always do that..

Ups!!! I was gone to far out of topic... Jeezee, this topic should be 'should we meet' right?

Kay, here is the point..!! bluesky, you've been stand up for me, giving me a support, spirit and time to share, everytime I feel down. Now, I actually want to share this excitement with you.. Beyond the horizon if we can :) That's why I raised that question.. Should we meet??

Hmmm, looks like we've been tempted to cross d border, dont u think? hehehehe...

About your post, I think you have the same place deep down in my heart, skyblue :) You'll always be there.. You'll always be some one I think about during the journey.. You'll be the one I see when I catch the sun in d daylight and the moon when its turn to dark. You are always be a special one.. uncomparable.

So, should we meet and crossing the border? *wink* :D:D:D

Cross de border .....

Dear blue
Today we have loong convo about "cross de border" after de phone hang up
I believe u must be smiling now as im laughing very hard hearing all ur xplaination de importance our meeting :)

uhmmm should we ,would we and could we ???
you you and you quite temptating me with all those justification

Love
I thought we both agree is horizon only our meeting point not any other place in this earth, and even we cant meet but you already knew all my feelings , our silent moment speak a thousand words .
None in this world could replace ur in my heart, None even if theres big storm or any thunders
Nothing gonna replace ur place in me.
None ever gave me special attention like u did de sweet tenderness , de serenade and million attention i couldnt describe one by one .
You got very special way too to love someone darling

Remember ... u got special place in my heart cant be replace by anyone ,anybody

Miss You ........... always

*Blue Sky*

be a writer..

blue sky,

kamu bilang, kamu yakin bahwa aku bisa jadi penulis -a great writer- suatu saat nanti.. you know you just made me shaking. aku coba inget2 lagi brp orang yang pernah bilang gitu ke aku.. and i found none.

aku bergetar tiap kali kamu bilang begitu.. karena keinginan itu --be a writer-- memang sesuatu yang sejak lama aku inginkan, tapi selama ini aku pendam.. mungkin jika aku gali lagi, aku tahu bahwa keinginan ini --menjadi penulis-- adalah sesuatu yang selama ini memanggilku. pendiam, tertutup, pengamat, lebih suka mendengar ketimbang berbicara, lebih suka bicara lewat tulisan ketimbang lewat kata-kata.. itu semua memang gambaran yang ada padaku, blue sky. it's me.

dan kamu membuat aku bergetar, karena kamu yang menangkap semua keinginanku. meski kamu (lets say) belum terlalu mengenalku..

and that makes you a very special one. kamu memang full of inspiration.

*blue ocean*

You have a great way to love some one...

Dear Skyblue,

Setiap pagi, ketika aku terjaga dan melihat ke jendela tatkala hari menjelang terang, aku selalu terbawa pada suatu kesadaran dimana kau selalu menjadi bagian dari kesadaran itu. Aku mengingatmu. Kuinginkan atau tidak, sel-sel memori di benakku selalu mengirimkan sinyal isyarat yang lalu kuartikan sebagai sebuah nama, satu sosok, seseorang.. yang mengarah pada dirimu. Aku tahu bahwa kamu selalu ada buatku. Tahu sekali.

I just want u to know that I do care for u. I do know that you'll stand beside me and helping me to overcome my problems. I know. If I choose not to share my problems with you, it just because I am trying to be tough. I do appreciate it, so much..

Kamu memang special, skyblue. The way you treat people is uncomparable. You have a great heart to love some one. When I realize that you put me in that very special place, I can't find any other word to describe it except.. being honoured. I'm flattered, off course. You just shown me what the meaning of.. love conquer everything.

And if I have a chance to come to your place in a such height.. I know I will say this without a hesitate.. I love you.

Remember, when we talk on the phone while you were in the car on your way home, I once said.. 'I love you'.. It because I can't stand the feeling grows in me when we know each other more and more.. I can't stand to keep it any while longer.. Your thought, your oh-so-lovely voice, your oh-so-crispy laugh, your vision, your 'aks.. I can not make my self forget all of you.. No matter how hard I want it so.

Now, I want u to know that you always have me too.. I wont go from the point I stand right now. My ocean will always available for your blue.. As we are aware that this relationship is gonna make as be better, then why should we switch the mode is off? 'Available mode will always on'.. Maybe we also have to switch the 'caution mode is on' at the certain time :) But the point is, we're always be a digital diary one to another..

As we can meet in the horizon at an uncertain time, then let us make it a very special time when it comes.. A time to share the blue, a time to care each other that I just wanna love you...

Yours,
Oceanblue

Tentang Biru.. Tentang Waktu

Dear Blue Sky,

Yang menyatukan kita memang warna. Kau memiliki biru di langitmu, dan aku memiliki biru di lautku. Tak pernah sekalipun aku bosan menikmati warna yang kau tebarkan. Mulai sejak aku membuka mata dan terjaga, hingga ketika langit menjelang kelam. Birumu selalu menggugahku.

Menarikku...

Mengikatku...

Dan kau,

Dua tahun memang bukan waktu yang panjang agar aku bisa lebih dalam mengenalmu. Tak banyak lembaran kenangan yang bisa kita gali direntang waktu sependek itu.

Tapi dua tahun juga bukan waktu sesaat untuk mengakhiri kisah yang sesungguhnya belum pernah kita mulai. Rentang waktu yang sesungguhnya sanggup mematikan percikan api kerinduan yang tak disertai keinginan untuk terus hidup, membesar dan membakar.

Tak ada riak...

Tak ada gejolak...

Namun nyatanya api itu terus menyala, seperti matahari yang kau genggam. Menghangatkan birunya lautku, menghangatkan air yang menyelimuti kedalamanku ruang hatiku. Menggugah gerak di dasarku.

Dan kau katakan padaku tentang tempat kita berjumpa di cakrawala. Di bidang mana biruku dan birumu menyatu. Di garis mana mengaburkan batas antara langit dan laut biru, menghilangkan penyekat diantara kita. Seperti halnya ketika kau aku berjumpa di dimensi yang maya, kita menyatu hati.

Sejiwa...

Maka jika memang harus kita 'hanya' bisa bertemu di kebiruan cakrawala, maka jadilah. Karena dimana pun, biru kita akan selalu sama. Langit dan laut akan selalu bercengkrama.


*Blue Ocean*

Dear Blue Ocean

Dearest Blue Ocean

after we talk this evening, I listening one of my fave song

* English Man in New York *

I'm an alien I'm a legal alien
I'm an Englishman in New York
I'm an alien I'm a legal alien
I'm an Englishman in New York
Modesty, propriety can lead to notoriety
You could end up as the only one
Gentleness, sobriety are rare in this society
At night a candle's brighter than the sun
Takes more than combat gear to make a man
Takes more than a license for a gun
Confront your enemies, avoid them when you can
A gentleman will walk but never run
If, "Manners maketh man" as someone said
Then he's the hero of the dayIt takes a man to suffer ignorance and smile
"Be yourself no matter what they say"

Blue `I knew u have lots of problem lately but like that song "Be yourself no matter what that say "just be U , my blue ocean always stand up in any weather , Nothing in this world could change ur colours
tonight i open our digital diary" voala "found ur ancient email since 2 years ago
whewwww Time goes by we have been through so many things
silent moment speaks a thousand words
i never realised our feelings getting stronger to one another even we only meet in a horizon :)

*blue sky*